Life goes on

It's now two days since the funeral ended, and I think we are all pretty
much recovered. Never having gone through something of this magnitude
before, I am a bit surprised at just how beneficial it was. Parts were very
painful....but when the final ceremony was over, it seemed many of us felt
ready to move one; we had the closure we needed. And I found that to be a
good thing.

I especially found Saturday mourning, when they brought the casket in to the
middle of the funeral grounds, to be a difficult time; even with a closed
casket, it all becomes so real when you see it there. I had planned to
attend every part of the funeral, but when it came time for everyone to go
to the cemetery, two good friends advised me not to go, saying it is too
hard and they also were not going, so I remained behind while John went to
the cemetery with several hundred others. We had good weather throughout
most of the proceedings; Saturday it was cloudy and cool for most of the
day. It was only during the Thanksgiving service, when the Pastor began to
preach, that it began to rain seriously, so that they had to disconnect the
sound equipment.

The funeral was a blend of cultures, not only Daniel and Leticia's different
family cultural traditions, but GILLBT culture as well. When we greeted
Daniel the week before the funeral and asked if there was anything we could
do to help, he asked us if we could set up a table with Leticia's picture,
flowers, a tablecloth and a "book of condolence" for people to sign...and if
we would sit there and explain to people what it was for, because it is not
traditional. So there were things like that happening.....amid traditional
things like drumming all night after the Friday night service.....wearing of
red and black on Friday and Saturday.....and what I gather is a "new"
tradition of wearing black and white at the thanksgiving service at the end
of the funeral. A cloth was made available for mourners to purchase and have
sewn up in advance that had a kente design on it that means "Comfort comes
from God". It was quite impressive to see hundreds of people in various
articles of clothing wearing this same cloth.

Daniel has held up amazingly throughout; I was amazed that he could get
through reading aloud the tribute he wrote for Leticia without breaking
down; it was very moving. Please continue to pray for him and Dzifa; Dzifa
is still staying with our friends, the Asares. John and I are also planning
to go and spend a few days with the Asares beginning tomorrow evening; it
has become our "tradition" to go stay with them at some point while our
participants are out in their various assignments. It provides us with a
refreshing break so we are better able to be fully recharged and ready for
two weeks of debriefing when our team returns.

Thanks again so much for your prayers for all of us as we have walked
through this season of grief. Please continue to pray for Daniel and Dzifa
as all the relatives leave and life gets back to "normal"...which is
anything but normal for them. n Please pray that our time with Asares and
Dzifa will be an encouragement to them, and a recharging time for us as
well.

In His love;

Shevawn